Innocent Questions | About Nudity | Opinions | Ketchup | More Nudity | Police | Elderly | Dress Up | School | Bible

The Questions goes like this...

1) NUDITY

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved.

She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

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2) OPINIONS

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother.

The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

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3) KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar.

During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

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4) MORE NUDITY

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room.

When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.

The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

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5) POLICE # 1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform,

She asked, "Are you a cop?" Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right? "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

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6) POLICE # 2

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment,

My K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said," What'd he do?"

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7) ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs.

One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

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8) DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."

"And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."

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9) DEATH

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin.

Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting , then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he gooooes."

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10) SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother .. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

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11) BIBLE


A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.

Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. ; ; "What have you got there, dear?

"With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear. "

Shocking Telegrams | Funny Telegrams | Postal Department Jokes | Short Sentences with Funny Meanings

TELEGRAM #1

A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams, which the father receives as:


"father, your daughter has been successful in BED."
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TELEGRAM #2

A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station sends a telegram to his wife: "I wish you were here."

The message received by wife: "I wish you were her."
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TELEGRAM #3

A wife with near maturing pregnan! Cy goes to railway station to return to her husband.

At the reservation counter, while her turn came, it was the last ticket.

Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the queue, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which reached as:

"Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train, gave birth to an old lady."
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TELEGRAM #4

A man wants to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he goes to order a birthday cake.

The salesman asks him what message he wants to put on the cake.

Well he thinks for a while and says:

Let's put, "you are not getting older you are getting better".

The salesman asks, "How do you want me to put it?"

The man says, Well put "You are not getting older", at the top and "! You are getting better" at the bottom.

The real fun didn't start until the cake was opened the entire party watched the message decorated on the cake:

"You are not getting older at the top, you are getting better at the bottom".
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TELEGRAM #5

A man from Agra went to Ajmer. His wife was in her parent's house in Delhi .

When the man went to Ajmer, he asked his servant to send a telegram to his wife indicating about his trip to Ajmer.

He sent a telegram. When the wife received the telegram, she fainted.

It was written:

'Sethji aaj mar ! Gaye! (Sethji Ajmer gaye )

Pulikesi !!!!!!!!!

Ha ha ha!!! Serious guys call it whatever you feel like. Pic taken on 29th Dec'06 New year party @ office. The concept was to get the looks of a tiger painted on my face. My great colleague also started painting up with that idea on my face but turned out to be something completely different from what we had actually thought..No clue what can i call this painting as. But looked little cool... So decided to be named as 24nallam pulikesi (in Tamil: irruvathi naallaam pulikesi).

WHY NEWTON COMMITED SUICIDE | Vijaykanth - The Actor | Newton - The Scientist's Story

Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.

In the movie of Vijaykanths, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes.................................

1)Vijaykanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent.In one of the fights, our great Vijaykanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured! Long Live Vijaykanth!

2) In another movie, Vijaykanth is confronted with 3 gangsters.Vijaykanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.

3) Vijaykanth is chased! by a gangster. Vijaykanth has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess, what he does. Nah? not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Vijaykanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang...the gangster dies...

This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast!

The 'climax' finally arrives. Vijaykanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Vijaykanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Vijaykanth has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax.

(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?)

Vijaykanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.

Newton commits suicide..

Ride To Yellagiri

Hey Guys!!!! Immmm back. After reading this you guys should be knowing as to why this is one of my most memorable rides with my Unicorn. So here it goessss...... me with 2 of my office colleagues were just having tea on a bright wednesday evening and were discussing why not take our newly bought unicorns for a big ride down and check out what it is capable of. (Colleagues : Prabhakar & Prakash)... Prabha says... hmmmm where do you wanna go. I said ok let us ride down to vellore (hometown for Prabha) which would hardly take abt 2 1/2 hrs with a 15 to 20 mins break inbetween. You crazy.. my back would go for a toss ...says prakash who is just goin to be a pillion rider in any one of the unicorns. I said cmon guys dont backup on this, lets c whether we can make it up this weekend and maybe plan out to stay up in yellagiri by just extending our ride.. Both nodded there heads by giving a lot of thought into this.. and just moved up in continuing there regular work.

With a lot of hesitations and arguments we finally got our plan finalised and we get ready to set off on the saturday morning . So i had to clean up my bike and make sure whether i had all the stuffs necessary for the ride as soon as I returned from office on Friday. All set to gear up and zoommmm.. was the first thing i got in my mind after getting up at around 5 am on saturday morning. Gave a buzz to both the buggas to make it up at a common point which was vallasarawakkam petrol pump and start up the ride. All set and here we leave at 6am sharp from the petrol pump.

I was riding down at a good pace lets say approx.90 kmph after crossing poonamalle with prakash siting in the back. So the ride happ to be cool and calm as we had set out early. I found that my bike was responding to the ride in a great way which made us reach up the Hyundai factory (Tvs Track opp) in abt 30 mins where we had stopped for the morning tea.

Great tea and few buns had made me little brisk and set up for the big ride. All set and done by positioning our bags on the petrol tanks so that it doesnt cause any disturbance while riding down. So me and prakash were chatting a long way abt the normal office stories and blah blah blah.. So then decided after reaching kanchepuram , why not take some snaps on the highway. So decided to give few poses as if Iwas a freq rider on the highway. Prakash says... dei mappila overda?!@!! Seri seri...

So after a few stops down the highways and little bit of pain on the wrong places made us reach Vellore @ around 8.45 am. We went up to Prabhas house and refreshed ourselves along with few dosai's and a great cup of coffee served by his mom. Not much resting and we started to take up bikes now down to yellagiri. After a lot of advises from prabhas mom and dad we started up. Me and prakash thought of returning back to vellore by night as there isnt much to hang out in yellagiri as we were only 3 and there isnt much to enjoy out there rather than just ripping our bikes and returning back. A strong voice comes out from prabhakars side that.. Dei... We are staying up in yellagiri and returning in the morning no more deviation from the plan made out... Am I clear. Nothing much to argue upon this made me and prakash node our heads by symbolically saying Okie.....

There we go riding down to the greatest place which i have been hearing from my bros biker gang. This time I made prakash sit in prabhas Unicorn so that i could stretch certain parts of my body while riding without any disturbances... U should be knowing what I am trying to say.. We reached at a point where the hills actually starts and picked up few beers so that we could refresh ourselves on the hills.. While riding up the hills I found something fishy happ at this place. I see only couples riding up and down the hills and we 3 looked like monkeys with jackets and helmets on. Then ok thought maybe the place is always like this and was riding up. Prabha had some probs getting the bike up the hills as he is not used to riding bikes up the hills. So told him the way to ride up the bike with the faint knowledge I have abt bike mechanism, as I was also scared abt my baby riding up.

Finally we reached up our destination at around 4 pm and opened a bottle of beer each to celebrate the success of the ride. We started searching for rooms which was our priority and to our surprise we dint get any rooms at all. So we had told prabha cmon yaar lets make it down after spending an hour or so here. No way... we are staying up here by all ways and he went to a lodge with was a kind of a neat one but which seem to be a kinda of a suspicious place to stay up. Luckily we got a room with a rent of 300 Rs for the night. After having a small bath and refreshing ourselves we started walking down the roades finding out whats all special in this place and chatting and making fun. (@ around 9 pm).

We landed up at around 10.30pm in our room and had a few pegs of rum along with rotis and kurma which we had ordered . All tired and we were chatting for a long time and decided to hit the bed at around 1.30 am i.e sunday morning. Just when i was dozing off to get into my dreamland I hear bangs and loud noises at the door. We were shit scared as who r these knocking the door at this time. I was unable to get up and open the door as prabha caught my hand tight saying not to open the door as it may be gundas here. I said... WHATTTTTTTTT... you crazy., leave me yaar. After abt 5 mins of banging prakash rushes out of the other room which had an extra bed and opens the door... To our surprise we see people half naked along with the cops.. I just thought man what have we got into now. It was a raid done in the lodge were all the rooms were occupied by prostitutes except ours. As soon as they saw us the cops shoot up question at us.. who are you guys and why r you here.. hmm hmm hmm.. blank blank blank was the reaction from my great colleagues. I had to explain the cops coming one step forward that we work in chennai and had come down for a bike ride. Prabha had given up the vellore address in the lodge and when enquired he gave the chennais address which landed up in the cops taking away our mobiles.

The cops screams and says pack up your bags take ur bikes and come down to the station. I said great we r gonna have the ultimate fun now only after the cops just passed out of our room. It was 2 am pitch dark with dew gettin down our heads . We land up at the station were i get to stand abt 10 steps away from the laughing prostitutes. I thought maybe they are used to this..my god..thinking and waiting finally a cop calls me and says now tell whats up with you guys and why did u stay here. Had to explain the entire story slowly and carefully. After a few question and answer sessions the cop says at the end says .. ok sign the paper over here and take ur mobile and u buggas should leave this place in the next 15 mins. Whossssssssssshhhhhhhh was the reaction from us after we stepped out of the station which was not at all necessary if the cops had listened to us in the room itself. We rushed to our bikes and made it down the hill.

There was a lot of confusion goin on when we were riding down as to what to do next.blah blah blah blah all goin on between us. I said lets kewl down now and check out a nice place to sit down , maybe in a 24 hr tea shop on the highway and get back to vellore at around 6 am. Luckily we found a calm place to sit and had a beautiful cup of tea . I was actually laughing out loudly in the tea shop making fun at both of my colleagues and thier great reactions when we were enquired. And i said finally eventhough we try to forget we would never ever forget this trip as we planned out something and it turned out to be something else.

After a few chit chatting with a couple of teas we reach up vellore at around 7 am on sunday morning and hit the bed straight .zzzzzz..zzzz.. a peaceful sleep until 12 pm . Had lunch and packed our bags ,me along with prakash rode down to chennai while prabha wanted to stay back for few days in vellore.

Bihar Driving License Application Form

DRIVING LICENSE APPLIKASON PHOROM NOTE: If you dot knows, please copy from another applikason phorom.Forphurthar instructions, see bottom applikason. Pleasedo not soot the person at the applikason kounter. He will give you the licen.

Last name:
(_) Yadav
(_) Sinha
(_) Pandey
(_) Misra
(_) Dot no
(Check karet box)

First name:
(_) Ramprasad
(_) Lakhan
(_) Sivprasad
(_) Jamnaprasad
(_) Dot no
(Check karet box)

Age:
(_) Less than phipty
(_) Greater than phipty
(_) Dot no
(Check karet box)

Sex:
____ M _____ (F) _____ not sure _____notapplicable

Chappal Size: ____ Lepht ____ Right

Occupason:
(_) Politison
(_) Doodhwala
(_) Pehelwaan
(_) House wife
(_) Un-employed
(Check karet box)

Number of children libing in the household: ___
Number that are yours: ___

Mother name: ____________ _________ __
Phather Name: ____________ ________ (If not no, leave blank)

Ejjucason: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest class attended)

Dental rekard:
(_) Ellow
(_) Berownish-ellow
(_) Berown
(_) Belack
(_) Others - Give egjhakt color
(Check karet box)

Your thumb imparesson (If you are copying from another applikasonpharom,please do not copy thumb impression also.Please provide your own thumb impression.)

PELEASE DO NOT USE PHINGERS OF YOUR LEGS Use thumb on your lepht hand only. If you dont have lepht hand, use your thumb on right hand. If you donot have right hand, use thumb on lepht hand.

NOTE : IF YOU DONT HAVE BOTH HANDS, YOU CANNOT DRIVE.WE ARE VARY ISTRICT ABOUT THIS

Hey! This is Arvind - The Entertainer | The Iceberg | Michael Schumacher | Ferrari F1 Fan | The Best Racer | Travelling & Entertainment

Hey guys. I am Arvind whos new to these blog stuffs. About me....Die hard fan of Schumi, Love riding, a simple person livin up with my own theories in life, Kewl head.

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