First win for A1 Team India
Sunday, December 16, 2007 
A1 Team India’s Narain Karthikeyan paid tribute to his superb pit crew taking his and the team’s first-ever A1GP race win in an incident-packed Feature race at Zhuhai International Circuit in China.
Karthikeyan was joined on the podium by New Zealand’s Jonny Reid, who started from tenth on the grid, and South Africa’s Adrian Zaugg, who finished third.
The 30-year-old Indian driver, who started from third on the grid, took the lead from New Zealand during the second pit stop window on lap 29. Despite a huge amount of pressure and some excellent racing from Reid, Karthikeyan held off the New Zealander’s Black Beauty racecar and crossed the line to score India’s first A1GP success.
After the race, a delighted Karthikeyan said: ‘The team has been working really hard at pit stop practices and they’ve done a really good job this weekend. Both the pit stops were excellent. Unfortunately I got stuck behind Pakistan on the out lap of my second stop, so I couldn’t push, but I came out just ahead of Jonny. There was a lot of pressure towards the end but then his tyres went off as well as mine and then we were equal - after that I just got the job done.’
Sunday, December 16, 2007
A1| Grand Prix| Narain Karthikeyan| India
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Alonso| Fernando| Renault| 2008 F1
Alonso to partner Piquet at Renault for 2008
Fernando Alonso will race for Renault next season alongside Nelson Piquet Jr, it was confirmed on Monday. The move marks Alonso’s return to the team with whom he won two world titles and follows a troubled 2007 season with McLaren.
Piquet’s promotion from test driver to race seat means Renault will field an all-new line-up for next season - and leaves current stars Giancarlo Fisichella and Heikki Kovalainen without confirmed drives for 2008.
“I am delighted to be returning to Renault,” said Alonso. “This is the team where I grew up as a driver in Formula One. Now it is time for us to begin a new chapter together. I am very excited about working with this great team once more, and confident that together we can move back to the front of the field. Renault had a difficult year in 2007, but I know that the team has real strength in depth. I am confident they can produce a fast and competitive car and be back at the top in 2008.”
“Fernando and Nelsinho will form one of the most exciting driver line-up of 2008,” commented Renault team principal Flavio Briatore. “We are delighted to be welcoming Fernando back home to the team where he enjoyed his greatest success. His abilities as a driver and a team leader are well known, and we look forward to forging another strong partnership. What’s more, he knows the team well and how we operate; he will feel comfortable straight away in this environment.
Alonso, 26, previously drove for Renault between 2003 and 2006, during which time he scored 15 Grand Prix victories and won two drivers’ championships, in 2005 and 2006.
Meanwhile, 22-year-old Brazilian Piquet spent 2007 as Renault’s test and reserve driver, after finishing runner-up in the 2006 GP2 series championship. The Brazilian will now make his Formula One debut at the 2008 Australian Grand Prix.
“First of all, I want to thank Flavio and Renault for putting their confidence in me for 2008,” said Piquet. “It is a fantastic opportunity to make my Formula One debut with one of the top teams on the grid, and alongside one of the very best drivers in the sport. This drive is something I have been working towards since the end of 2006, and I am proud that my performances as test driver have earned me this position. I am looking forward to teaming up with Fernando, and learning from him. As a rookie, there is no better way to start your career than to have a double world champion as your reference point.”
Briatore added: “Nelsinho is one of the most promising young talents in motorsport. After his success in GP2, he has spent a year learning the ropes as our test driver and getting to know the team; he is now ready to step up to the next level.”
Alonso and Piquet will be supported by Frenchman Romain Grosjean, reigning 2007 F3 Euroseries Champion and a product of Renault’s driver development scheme, in the role of test driver.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Understanding F1| Aerodynamics| Brakes| Cockpit| Driver fitness| Engine| Fuel| Overtaking
Understanding the Sport - F1
Aerodynamics
A modern Formula One car has almost as much in common with a jet fighter as it does with an ordinary road car. Aerodynamics have become key to success in the sport and teams spend tens of millions of dollars on research and development in the field each year.
Brakes
When it comes to the business of slowing down, Formula One cars are surprisingly closely related to their road-going cousins. Indeed as ABS anti-skid systems have been banned from Formula One racing, most modern road cars can lay claim to having considerably cleverer retardation.
Cockpit / safety
At the heart of the modern Formula One car lies the immensely strong 'monocoque' structure, often referred to as the 'tub'. This incorporates the cockpit and the driver's 'survival cell', but also forms the principal component of the car's chassis, with the engine and the front.
Cornering
Cornering is vital to the business of racing cars, and Formula One is no exception. On straights the battle tends to be determined by the power of engine and brakes, but come the corners and the driver's skill becomes more immediately apparent.
Driver fitness
Formula One drivers are some of the most highly conditioned athletes on earth, their bodies specifically adapted to the very exacting requirements of top-flight single-seater motor racing.
Drivers' clothing
Formula One helmets are designed around the clear need to protect drivers' heads from the risk of major impacts. But the rest of his clothing has an equally serious purpose: offering the best possible defence against the risks of fire.
Engine / gearbox
The engine and transmission of a modern Formula One car are some of the most highly stressed pieces of machinery on the planet, and the competition to have the most power on the grid is still intense.
Flags
Marshals at various points around the circuit are issued with a number of standard flags, all used to communicate vital messages to the drivers as they race around the track. A special display in each driver’s cockpit - known as a GPS marshalling system also lights up when the flags are on.
Fuel
Surprising but true, despite the vast amounts of technical effort spent developing a Formula One car, the fuel it runs on is surprisingly close to the composition of ordinary, commercially available petrol.
HANS
HANS stands for the Head and Neck Support system, an innovative safety device that has been seen in other codes of motorsport for years, but which became mandatory in Formula One for the first time in 2003. Its purpose is simple: to massively reduce the loadings caused to a driver.
Helmets
One of the most important safety devices in Formula One racing is the driver's helmet. Although its fundamental shape may look very similar to those worn by drivers in the 1980s and even the 1970s, the underlying design and construction technology has changed radically over the years.
Overtaking
As only one driver can ever sit on pole position for a race, and the entire grid wants to finish on the top step of the podium, overtaking is of vital importance to the business of racing. Simplified to its most basic form overtaking is nothing more than gaining track position.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
F1| Formula One| Schumi | About F1 Cars| F1 technology| Micheal Schumacher| F1 Mechanism
Some Interesting Facts - Formula1 Racing
01. An F1 car is made up of 80,000 components, if it were assembled 99.9% correctly, it would still start the race with 80 things wrong!
02. Formula 1 cars have over a kilometre of cable, linked to about 100 sensors and actuators which monitor and control many parts of the car.
03. An F1 car can go from 0 to 160 kph AND back to 0 in FOUR seconds !!!!!!!
04. F1 car engines last only for about 2 hours of racing mostly before blowing up on the other hand we expect our engines to last us for a decent 20yrs on an average and they quite faithfully DO....thats the extent to which the engines r pushed to perform...
05. When an F1 driver hits the brakes on his car he experiences retardation or deceleration comparable to a regular car driving through a BRICK wall at 300kmph !!!
06. An average F1 driver looses about 4kgs of weight after just one race due to the prolonged exposure to high G forces and temperatures for little over an hour (Yeah thats right!!!)
07. At 550kg a F1 car is less than half the weight of a Mini.
08. In an F1 car the engine typically revs upto 18000 rpm,(the piston travelling up and down 300 times a second!!) wheres cars like the palio, maruti 800,indica rev only upto 6000 rpm at max. Thats 3 times slower.
09. The brake discs in an F1 car have an operating temperature of approx 1000 degees Centigrade and they attain that temp while braking before almost every turn...that is why they r not made of steel but of carbon fibre which is much more harder and resistant to wear
and tear and most of all has a higher melting point.
10. If a water hose were to blow off, the complete cooling system would empty in just over a second.
11. Gear cogs or ratios are used only for one race, and are replaced regularly to prevent failure, as they are subjected to very high degrees of stress.
12. The fit in the cockpit is so tight that the steering wheel must be removed for the driver to get in or out of the car. A small latch behind the wheel releases it from the column. Levers or paddles for changing gear are located on the back of the wheel. So no gearstick! The clutch levers are also on the steering wheel, located below the gear paddles.
13. To give you an idea of just how important aerodynamic design and added downforce can be, small planes can take off at slower speeds than F1 cars travel on the track.
14. Without aerodynamic downforce, high-performance racing cars have sufficient power to produce wheel spin and loss of control at 160 kph. They usually race at over 300 kph.
15. The amount of aerodynamic downforce produced by the front and rear wings and the car underbody is amazing. Once the car is travelling over 160 kph, an F1 car can generate enough downforce to equal it's own weight. That means it could actually hold itself to the CEILING of a tunnel and drive UPSIDE down!
16. In a street course race like the monaco grand prix, the downforce provides enough suction to lift manhole covers. Before the race all of the manhole covers on the streets have to be welded down to prevent this from happening!
17. The refuelers used in F1 can supply 12 litres of fuel per second. This means it would take just 4 seconds to fill the tank of an average 50 litre family car.They use the same refueling rigs used on US military helicopters today.
18. TOP F1 pit crews can refuel and change tyres in around 3 seconds. & 8 sec to read above point.
19. Race car tyres don't have air in them like normal car tyres. Most racing tyres have nitrogen in the tyres because nitrogen has a more consistent pressure compared to normal air. Air typically contains varying amounts of water vapour in it, which affects its expansion and
contraction as a function of temperature, making the tyre pressure unpredictable.
20. During the race the tyres lose weight! Each tyre loses about 0.5 kg in weight due to wear.
21. Normal tyres last 60 000 - 100 000 km. Racing tyres are designed to last 90 - 120 km (That's Khandala and back).
22. A dry-weather F1 tyre reaches peak operating performance (best grip) when tread temperature is between 900C and 1200C.(Water boils boils at 100C remember) At top speed, F1 tyres rotate 50 times a second.
So Formula Driving is not piece of cake, DEAR!!! No Wonder, thats why Michael Schumacher is the world richest Sports Person!!!!
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Try to understand what is Spam? | An Extract of Spam Mail | Internet Security | Nirosha Silva - The Spam Mail | Best Spam Explanation
Subject:FW.[SPAM] I am writing this behalf of my loving husband
Dear Reader,
I am writing this behalf of my loving husband. Everything was fine, me, my husband and our two children. We had a happy family. My husband was an Engineer in a big company. He comes home early and helps me with the house chores and plays with the children. Our dreams was shattered in front of our eyes last week. It was a drunk lorry driver, came on the wrong side and hit us and went. It killed my little baby girl and left my husband paralyed. My husband is still in the hospital. His brain is damaged and he needs a operation. I need 5 lahks to save his life. I collected about 3 lahks from my friends and family. I need another 2 lahks. I don't want to lose him. He was such a wonderful husband & father. He still doesn't know we lost our little girl. I am looking after my son now. Without my husband I won't be able to takecare of him.
Please help me save my husband the one person I dearly love. I already lost my daughter and I don't want to lose my husband as well. Please help us.
Thank you very much for your love & support. May God bless you.
Yours Truly,
Nirosha Silva
(I know you don't like to forward mails. I am really sorry to bother you. If you have a heart and like to help a family, please forward this mail. Every mail you forward will add 5 cents to AOL and they will deposit it to my bank account. Which will help me save my husband.)
Points to be noted here.
1.) In the subject the Mail Server itself shows that its a SPAM
2.) The Content
3.) It states "Every mail you forward will add 5 cents to AOL", Here note that there is no track back url.
4.) If any service provider wants to pay for this kind of activities they might get a small space for donation in their website.
Note: If you are going to make a donation online, see if that the website is a legitimate one. Also you might have noted and experienced as well that you would get money if you forward this mail to 100 people etc and so on. So inorder to do this the SPAMMERS they use the reputed companies name like Microsoft Corporation, AOL and so on. Also sometimes it comes with some attachments which might be a virus file.
Though there are Spam Blockers installed in the system, people anyway manage to get these kinds of email and forward it to their friends in their contact list. So it is in the hands of us, not to encourage these kinds of emails.
Source: http://yuvi-internetsecurity.blogspot.com/
Link Sources: anti - Spam, anti-spam software, Antispam, duplicate email, email spam blocker, non secure email, spam blocker, spam email, spam message, what is spam
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Tongue Twisters | funny tongue twister | english tongue twister | English Tests
Tongue Twisters
1. If you understand, say "understand" . If you don't understand, say " don't understand". But if you understand and say "don't understand". How do I understand that you understand? Understand!
2.I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
3. Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.
4 .A sailor went to sea to see, what he could see. And all he could see was sea, sea, sea.
5 . Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People.
6 .If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?
7 .I thought a thought.But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought. If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.
8 .Once a fellow met a fellow In a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, "If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow What a fellow means?"
9.Mr Inside went over to see Mr Outside. Mr Inside stood outside and called to MrOutside inside. Mr Outside answered Mr Inside from inside and Told Mr Inside to come inside. Mr Inside said "NO", and told Mr Outside to come outside. Mr Outside and Mr Inside argued from inside and outside about going outside or coming inside. Finally, Mr Outside coaxed Mr Inside to come inside, then both Mr Outside and Mr Inside went outside to the riverside.
10.SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS ON THE SEA SHORE , BUT THE SEA SHELLS THAT SHE SELLS, ON THE SEA SHORE ARE NOT THE REAL ONES
11. The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.
12.If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors? "When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor's the doctor. Does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor's way"
13.We surely shall see the sun shine shortly. Whether the weather be fine, Or whether the weather be not, Whether the weather be cold Or whether the weather be hot, We'll weather the weather Whatever the weather, Whether we like it or not. Watch? Whether the weather is hot.
Whether the weather is cold. Whether the weather is either or not. It is whether we like it or not.
14.Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely .
15 .A flea and a fly in a flue Said the fly "Oh what should we do" Said the flea" Let us fly Said the fly"Let us flee" So they flew through a flaw in the flue .
16.If you tell Tom to tell a tongue-twister his tongue will be twisted as tongue-twister twists tongues.
17.Mr. See owned a saw.And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore.Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw.But it was sad to see Soar so sore Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw .....
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
WIFE VS. HUSBAND | Jokes | Funny Stories | Huband & Wife Jokes | The Silent Treatment
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep ," the wife replied, "In-laws."
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...The husband then turned to his wife and asked, " What?"
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee." Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, That it indeed says........ .. "HEBREWS"
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were givingeach other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM ." He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious , he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM, Wake up."
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Worst day of life | Bar Jokes | The Drunkard Jokes
Worst day of life
There's this little guy sitting inside a bar, just looking at his drink . He stays like that for half-hour. Then, this big trouble making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says: " Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't see a man crying." "No, it's not that. Today is the worst day of my life. First, I overslept and was late to an important meeting. My boss, outrageous, fired me. When I left the building to my car,
I found out it was stolen. The police, they said they couldn't do anything.
I got a cab to return home, and after I paid the cab driver and the cab had gone, I found that I left my wallet in the cab. I got home only to find my wife was with the gardener. I left home and came to this bar. When I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison ..."
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
FUNDAY @ COMODO | The Best Entertainment in Office | The Joyful Moments in Comodo | The Unforgetable Day
Hey Guys!.. Immmm Back. This time would let you guys know abt the celebrations that happened on May 5th'07 which would never be forgotten in the history of COMODO(the office where I work..). The day was termed as the "FUNDAY" which is happeneing for the 2nd time in our office(prev happ on 7th OCt'06).
Things which were prepeared and arranged for the event:
* Red T-Shirts with a smiley printed on it. 
* Welcome drink.
* The Awards for the performers of the team.
* Cake to celebrate the success and the growth of the team.
* Biriyani for lunch.
* Gifts for the games that are to be conducted.
* The Music set to keep our spirits alive.(U c we cant stay wihout music..)
* Decoration items and posters to let the company know abt the event.
Whoooshhh.. I guess thats all......
To let you guys know before I start explaining as to what had all happ on that day.. I would like you all know the hero of the day.. The Organiser of the event .. Yeah thats'me.. he he he. Ok here it goes... me as usual arrived soon to office as there were some decorations and baloon blowing which had to be finished up to complete the entire decorations for the event. So as i started up I could see few of my colleagues just walkin in and gettin ready to party up. So with a few hazzles and jokes and also with the help of certain fellow mates could finally finish up the entire decorations and arrangements to get the day started. So @ around 9.30 am I could see The Galatta Gumbal... My team(the crowd) dancin in along with the music which was been played and takin up thier seats. So after a lot of shoutings, screaming and bangings I was finally able to make the team settle down for me to start up the event @ 10.30 am.
I started by givin up a small speech as to why we actually celebrate a day called FUNDAY which was followed with Cake cuttin and the awards ceremony for the performers of the team.. Then as I needed some time to start up my next event which was the Quiz, we had asked the new joinees in our team to express thier views as to how they feel within the team. After that the game started up by me splitting up the teams. Man I had a tough time setting up the questions for the quiz keepin in mind as to whether my guys would atleast answer a few which I had prepared. To my surprise I could see the guys fully geared up and shooting answers. Happened to be a great show and after abt 1 1/2 hrs.. the the quiz ended by declaring the winners . Photos enclosed (Yuva, harish, ramesh & Syed.. the winners).
So after the quiz I had planned to conduct the Dumb charades for which i had to spilt the teams again. I was served with a refreshing rose milk which gained me little more energy to conduct the next event for the day. Serious dudes.. this game was making people go MAD and crazy. A lot of acting skills which I had never seen in few of my coleagues were shown in great style to make thier team win. I had prepared only 2 topics for the game which involved Tamil & English movies. 5 solid rounds of each which ended up in a tie for the 2nd and 3rd place. Had a few more rounds to finalise the positions. 
After a little of waiting we had settled ourselves for the yummy lunch (Biriyani) organised by yuva. Great lunch mon... all set and gearedup to conduct the next event for the day which was TAMBOLA (Famously called Lotto Housie). Sold the housie ticket at a rate of Rs.10 each. the full house cash amt was RS.250..First, middle & the last row cash amt was Rs.50 each. The game had a great start.. I could see the fellas catching thier heads ,bitting their nails to finish up any one row to bag the cash amt. After abt 1/2 hr of number screamings from the lot and gettin the winners for the first, middle & last row ... I heard a sudden bang on the table along with a scream who was none other than Vasanth (Colleague) who sprang up showing his ticket that he had the full house. Congragulated him and asked him to enzaiii with the cash amt.
As we had some more time to wind up the day, I decided to go on with an other game which was actually termed as Passing the item but which had turned out to be the best event for the day where people had the chances to rag few other fellas which they wanted to do for a very long time. The music was controlled by me via the laptop wherein the person who gets the item when the music stops has to perfom all kind of cranky things which thier colleagues tell them. The floor was full of laughter when each one performed diff acts. To give you guys a outline as what were the topics..naaa...cant say it.. this is a family blog guys. he he he.....
After a lot of laughter & enzaiment we finally winded up the day by giving few good poses for the cameras and dancin to few of our favourite tunes. I personally feel that this Funday had turned out to be a mega successful event and I take the pride in thanking all the fella mates who had helped me to organise the event and make it a grand sucess.
FUNDAY - ENJOYMENT MATTERS
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Family Problems !!!!!! | Love Marriages | Confused Family | Problematic Family
Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.
The Indian man said to the American,"You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once.
We call this arranged marriage.I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love...I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems."
The American said, " Talking about love marriages?... I'll tell you my story.
I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years.
"After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.
My daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.
More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son I.e. My brother is my grandson.
Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson.
And you say you have family problems.. !!!
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Innocent Questions | About Nudity | Opinions | Ketchup | More Nudity | Police | Elderly | Dress Up | School | Bible
The Questions goes like this...
1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved.
She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"
***********
2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother.
The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
***********
3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar.
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."
***********
4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room.
When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.
The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
***********
5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform,
She asked, "Are you a cop?" Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right? "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"
***********
6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment,
My K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said," What'd he do?"
***********
7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs.
One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
***********
8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."
***********
9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin.
Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting , then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he gooooes."
***********
10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother .. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"
***********
11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.
Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. ; ; "What have you got there, dear?
"With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear. "
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Shocking Telegrams | Funny Telegrams | Postal Department Jokes | Short Sentences with Funny Meanings
TELEGRAM #1
A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams, which the father receives as:
"father, your daughter has been successful in BED."
************
TELEGRAM #2
A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station sends a telegram to his wife: "I wish you were here."
The message received by wife: "I wish you were her."
************
TELEGRAM #3
A wife with near maturing pregnan! Cy goes to railway station to return to her husband.
At the reservation counter, while her turn came, it was the last ticket.
Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the queue, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which reached as:
"Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train, gave birth to an old lady."
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TELEGRAM #4
A man wants to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he goes to order a birthday cake.
The salesman asks him what message he wants to put on the cake.
Well he thinks for a while and says:
Let's put, "you are not getting older you are getting better".
The salesman asks, "How do you want me to put it?"
The man says, Well put "You are not getting older", at the top and "! You are getting better" at the bottom.
The real fun didn't start until the cake was opened the entire party watched the message decorated on the cake:
"You are not getting older at the top, you are getting better at the bottom".
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TELEGRAM #5
A man from Agra went to Ajmer. His wife was in her parent's house in Delhi .
When the man went to Ajmer, he asked his servant to send a telegram to his wife indicating about his trip to Ajmer.
He sent a telegram. When the wife received the telegram, she fainted.
It was written:
'Sethji aaj mar ! Gaye! (Sethji Ajmer gaye )
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Pulikesi !!!!!!!!!
